Steffani, a mother of two, never thought she would be a good parent — even before she had children. She struggled getting in tune with her nurturing, maternal side, and years later, her “bad parent” trigger still surfaces, especially when her children don’t listen to her during an event as routine as bath time.

“I set myself up to fail,” Steffani says, teary-eyed. “Then, it’s a self-fulfilling prophesy — You’re going to find any little way to prove that you’re not a good parent.”

In the above video, parenting expert Dr. Shefali Tsabary explains the deep truth about “good” and “bad” parents, and helps Steffani understand what is really behind her emotional parenting struggle.

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