As a child, Shannon says she had to learn to be independent at an early age. Now, as the mother of a son and a daughter, she admits that she’s harder on her daughter because she wants her to grow up to be strong, just like her mom. Parenting expert Dr. Shefali Tsabary says Shannon’s daughter is now showing her what she left behind as a girl.

“We rarely ever parent from the present, and we rarely ever not parent in fear,” Dr. Shefali says. “Our children [come] forth completely comfortable with their feelings. You were severed from your feelings because of your difficult childhood.”

Before you tell your child to stop crying, find out what Dr. Shefali says about protecting, validating and honoring your child’s emotions.

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